Here are some common questions we get asked
Chris, how do you qualify as an elite matchmaker?
Well, after 15-years successfully matching top 1% bachelors in the nation, I like to believe test of time counts for something.
And here’s an interesting factoid: 100% of my clients who said to me, “Chris, I am going to marry one of these matches” (after meeting only one and no more than three women) went on to get married.
And of those clients who got engaged, 100% got married.
What that tells me is the quality of single women we represent excels the expectations of my clients—and most importantly, a client’s heart is ready, when it’s ready!
Any divorces, of those clients who got married?
Yes, like real life, there have been some divorces. But when that’s happened, the client never held it against me. In fact, I am usually rehired for round #2.
I happen to deal with a mature demographic that actually prefers to be married. By the time they hire 4M, most come with one or two divorces behind them anyway.
Life goes on for my top-tiered clients; they don’t live in the past! They move forward.
Do your clients, since they are affluent, insist on having a prenup?
You would think so, right? Most do have a prenuptial agreement in place, but there are always one or two outliers in the bunch who don’t.
How do you personally feel about prenuptial agreements?
You’ve GOT to have one!! It drives me nuts when I hear women in general say, “Well, if he really loves me, he wouldn’t ask for a prenup.”
I say if you really love him, it’s your obligation to make sure a prenup is fair and equitable, but you’ve got to have one in place—especially when considerable assets are at stake.
That works both ways, by the way. When a woman has money or has assets she wants protected (such as real estate or a business), she needs a prenup, too!
I try and match my clients with educated, smart women who understand a prenup is standard for my 1% crowd. I never had a client report to me his fianceé refused to sign one. So that’s good to know, I guess.
Can you tell me more about your background, Chris?
You mean how I transformed a former sloped, garbage/recycle dump in uptown Seattle and turned it into a beautiful and serene park-like garden? Manually digging, sweating, lopping, planting, mulching, fertilizing, replacing soil, hardscaping (even bleeding—those darn blackberry thorns!) for over 9 years now.
Oh, you mean my background on a more professional level?
Well, I created, launched and owned a professional temporary staffing agency in downtown Chicago, on LaSalle Street to be exact. For over 11-years, my staff and I sent temps to some of the largest clients in Chicago, including the Wrigley Company, Prudential, Quaker Oats, IBM and too many more to remember.
My motto was, “start with Fortune 500 companies only, and work your way down.” (I guess that carried over to my matchmaking agency, working with top % bachelors.)
And prior to that, I did executive search on retainer for Deloitte & Touche (now Deloitte), recruiting senior level partners in the $500K+ salary range for one of their West Coast offices. Did that from my condo in Chicago—before it was cool and trendy to work virtually.
And way before that, I set up Price Waterhouse’s (now PriceWaterhouseCoopers) first satellite office in Oak Brook, IL. This was decades ago! I worked at their headquarters in downtown Chicago as an EA for a couple partners. Human resources saw my drive and promoted me to manage and set up this new office.
It was a big deal back then, as all eyes were on PW to see if a suburban office could work—and it was huge success!
I also had a unique run with Hollywood; let’s just say I nearly got a sitcom produced by NBC, until CBS’s show runner took my script and turned it into their own sitcom. They beat us by a hair. Live and learn. But my love for comedy has never ceased (and I still love Hollywood – CBS, not so much.)
Would you say you are wiser than most, and that’s what makes you an expert in the matchmaking, dating and relationship arenas?
I’m laughing right now. Because whatever wisdom I do possess was earned (and learned) through tough times and good times – and everything in-between. But I would say on a scale of 1 to 10, as far as intuition goes, I am a solid 8 on a typical day. And maybe even a 9 or 10, when the universe is really speaking to me!
What is it you like about what you do?
I am a born communicator. Or maybe a closet talk show host. Remember Tom Snyder? (I am dating myself, no pun intended.)
I love digging deep and getting to know my clients and candidates…because if nothing else, I am always “curious Chris.” I am seriously interested in the men and women I interview—I want to know what makes them tick!
It does feel great to know people fall in love, because of my introductions. But it’s not rocket science. It is that extra sixth sense; plus really listening to what my client wants (or what he THINKS he wants.) So my intuitiveness and honed people skills have served me well in this business.
Plus I am not afraid to throw in a wild card now and then – you know, when my gut is saying “this woman is going to be a great match”, and then my client is like, “well, how about that—who knew I’d fall for a woman with two young kids!”.
I may have been a casting director in another lifetime – because that is exactly what I am doing, and I am very comfortable in this role. You know, casting the beautiful woman to star in my hugely successful client’s life – his “happy ever after!”
Then again, my clients really have all the power. Because no matter whom I present them, they always have an option to say, “No thanks, l want to see other matches.”
What is ‘Ask The Matchmaker’ Teleseminar you are promoting on your site?
Thank you for asking!
I am so excited about this, because if all goes well, my plan is to build my own “tribe” of men and women, where I can chat live one-on-one—a teleseminar where guys and gals, live on the phone, can ask me questions about love, relationships, dating or anything that’s going on in their lives.
We all need a sounding board sometimes. Because we get stuck in life, and we’re not sure whom we can trust with our angst, fears, confusion or whatever!
So now they can ‘Ask the Matchmaker’ (ATM) – and I will do my very best and give them a direct, heartfelt and genuine answer.
One-on-one “chats” are one of my biggest strengths. My clients have frequently told me my advice is practical and real. I guess we’ll see how that translates to my ATM tribe – well, once I acquire one anyway!
I am always a straight shooter, and I don’t care if I am talking to Gandhi, Gloria Steinem, Brad Pitt or Honey Boo Boo. There is something about talking to an individual, getting to know them and building that trust.
At the end of the day we are just two spirits trapped in a human outer shell, you know what I mean?
Why are you in Seattle?
You’d rather I be in Little Rock?
Just kidding—I have nothing against Arkansas. BUT, I always smile when I am asked this question.
Because doesn’t a business have to be SOMEWHERE?
The bottom line is I can be anywhere, really, because we are NOT a local matchmaking agency. In fact, when Seattle CEO bachelors contact me, it’s almost never a good fit.
Do you know why?
Because executives in Seattle want to date women in Seattle – they are a tough crowd here. The 4M Club has wonderful ladies from across America, but we don’t cater to “Seattle men and Seattle women.”
I don’t mean to pick on Seattle CEO’s, by the way. They are just as welcome to hire our services, as clients do from other major cities. But if you don’t agree with our “long-distance” introduction strategy (when local women are not as abundant), then it’s better to try a dating service solely catering to women in your own city.
Or you can always continue online dating – but how has that been working for you?
Clients who hire 4M are willing to travel anywhere in the country, especially with the possibility of finding their soul mate. And yes, every client who has married or is presently in a long-term romantic relationship (non-married), the woman is living with the man in HIS city. Or she’s temporarily commuting if her career is involved.
You should know when there are women in the client’s city and are a good match, then of course we present her first. But clients shouldn’t count on it—be open to wherever the love of your life might actually reside. I always say, “true love has no geographical boundaries.”
Our clients really are adventurers at heart! But at the end of the day, they are still Mr. Picky Pants. They want what they want—and it’s my job to provide. They deserve as much.
And here’s yet another factoid : Every 4M marriage started out as long-distance.
So not only can it work, it does work.
Now are you really asking how did I end up in Seattle from Chicago?
Well, it did involve a man and romance, yes. And from the moment I landed here, I simultaneously ramped up the 4M Club and launched in Autumn of 2001.
I don’t have to be in Seattle these days – but when you’ve built this massive garden (gave birth to it organically, a year after losing my mom to Alzheimer’s), it’s almost like trying to figure out how to leave your baby – but who is now almost grown up.
And in 2013, I asked a veterinarian to meet me in my garden, to put down my beloved and dying kitty, Boo—because it was her most favorite place to be! The garden turned out to be a loving tribute to both my mom AND cat.
If anyone has suggestions how to leave Seattle one day, I’m listening. I’m in no rush, but my favorite cities are Malibu (or the Hollywood Hills area) and Chicago. But I can’t ever take the garden with me, and that just makes me sad (unless there is someone to maintain it with the same devotion as me.)
So you can see, even ‘Ask the Matchmaker’ herself needs an advisor sometimes!
Are you always this open?
That’s funny, because by nature I am really a private person (albeit a “personable” and private person.) But if I am going to build an ATM tribe, I have to allow myself to be vulnerable, too. I have to earn everyone’s trust, which means sometimes sharing my own burdens or past stupidities….they’re life lessons, too, right?
How do you want to end this interview?
Gosh, I don’t know. I’ve enjoyed answering your questions – fortunately I’ve had time to think about them and even better, WRITE my responses. When the media interviews me in person, I usually feel on the spot, especially reporters who want a sound bite. If you want a sound bite, give me your questions in advance, ha.
I want to personally thank the phenomenal men who have entrusted me to find them suitable matches. And to all the women who apply—while you are not my client, you are the cog to the wheel.
I hope qualified men are never afraid to contact me (I promise I am not a Ginsu Knife “sales pitchy” kind of person.) You deserve quality love in your life again, and I am here to find her for you.
And for all the smart, beautiful, healthy and kind women in the United States reading this (age 35 to 55), I want you to apply right now – because YOU today (or one day) MAY be the perfect soul mate for our deserving clientele!
With gratitude,
Chris
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