Q: Chris, when you get to know someone over the phone, how long before you should actually meet in person if you feel a connection?

~ Allison from Dallas

Hi, Allison:

The answer depends if you are referring to a local date or long distance.

Either way, I always advise “meet in person as soon as possible.”

If this is a long-distance date, “as soon as possible” could mean a week or two (at least with my own elite matchmaking clientele.)

But in the real world, it’s not always so simple. A long distance first date probably means more planning and budgeting—so maybe he can meet you in a month. Yes, HE should fly (or drive) to your turf when first getting to know you.

But if more than a month goes by chatting on the phone, and you still haven’t met in person—I would probably concentrate on dating locally. Otherwise you’ll be stuck forever with a long-distance phone buddy.

Now if we are talking about meeting someone locally, why are you waiting?

Talking on the phone (just like texting) can quickly become a crutch. Don’t allow it. One or two short, pleasant phone conversations should be enough. And then MEET HIM in person at a nearby restaurant or café.

The time is NOW to find out if there is a real connection or not—not countless phone chats later.

Value your time and he will value you!

Warmly,

Chris

P.S. Readers, please share this on your Facebook, Digg, Delicious, Reddit, Twitter or any appropriate social media site–spread the word! I really do respond to authentic inquiries as time allows.